When beasts go bonkers! 5 bizarre animal attacks + Pets at Home COMPETITION

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In 2009 a report carried out by the ‘The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’ for American publication ‘Morbidity and Mortality Weekly’ (cheerful title!) claimed that 86,000 US residents suffered fall injuries due to their pets.

It’s a whopping great number and a total which hints at a couple of major issues on the other side of the Atlantic. Either the population is rapidly going blind or there is a huge rise in evil-minded animals quietly determined on bringing human’s back down to earth with a bump. Rex may look docile as he tucks into his Pedigree Chum, but how do you know for sure he doesn’t hate you?

While the media often focuses on the more sensational stories of swimmers being scoffed by sharks, crocodiles and giant snakes or those freakish big cat attacks, it appears the real danger lies closer to home.

That being said, Quidblog isn’t one for keeping a level head in these circumstances. There’s no fun in writing about an old lady who sprained her toe after tripping on Nibbles the hamster. Instead we’re going with five wacky and bizarre incidents where animals have caused famous public figures not just real damage…but even death!

Monkey Business

Long after they were famous for pioneers in medicine and philosophy, and a fair while before they hit the headlines for suicidal fiscal policies, the Greeks made a splash for bizarre encounters with animals.

Take for example the following situation which played out in 1920. Taking a stroll with his dog through the National Gardens of Athens, King Alexander I was set upon by angry monkeys after he tried to defend his pet from their unwanted attentions. Swatting one of the offending brutes with a stick, he was bitten by the other on the hand and suffered a punctured gland when gnawed a second time by the infectious duo.

Within days of the ordeal the King developed a severe reaction to the infection, and despite showing signs of improvement died 18 days later. As our own monarch gets ready to celebrate her Diamond Jubilee, we can only praise her for her corgi-walking bravery.

Pain in the neck

Having made a career raising, taming, training and working with tigers and lions alongside his stage partner Siegfried Fischbacher it was inevitable that the Vegas career of Roy Horn would be cut short by one of his animal assistants.

While performing his trademark magic in Sin City’s Mirage casino in 2003, Horn was ‘accidently’ attacked and bitten in the neck by a 7-year-old white tiger, named Montecore, as thousands of horrified ticketholders, not to mention his mate, watched on. Subdued backstage by a fire extinguisher, the tiger eventually let go of Horn allowing the performer to be rushed to hospital.

Amazingly, in 2009, Horn and Montecore, both having survived the ordeal, appeared one final time in a benefit gig. It was a pre-recorded show.

Huffin and Puffin

Love him or hate him, Gordon Ramsay certainly knows how to grab the headlines. When he’s not taking his shirt off on TV (what’s that all about anyway?), running marathons or being cantankerous in the kitchen, it turns out he likes to hunt puffins. That’s right, puffins; those cuddly little bird things that look a bit like penguins!

It wasn’t quite as easy a process as the Scot had hoped as he embarked on his mission in 2008 on Iceland’s Westman Islands. As well as falling from a cliff into dangerous waters, Ramsay was also embarrassingly attacked by one of his prey and had to receive three stiches in his nose.

Unfortunately, the chef still fulfilled his aim, cooking a puffin on The F-Word before being barraged with viewer complaints.

Shakira not stirred

You’d imagine the biggest problem facing pop princess Shakira on a day-to-day basis is keeping her dopey footballer boyfriend, Gerard Pique, breathing at regular intervals. Alas, it turns out she’s also got to deal with exotic sealife trying to ‘Waka Waka’ her.

Earlier this year the Colombian megastar found herself on the receiving end of unwanted attention from a sea lion while visiting South Africa. Tweeting that the beast looked her in the eye before roaring with fury, it was only the swift actions of her brother that saved her from being seriously insulted by the offender’s fishy breath.

In an attempt to escape the pint-size bottom wiggler (Shakira) cut her hand on a rock. She later explained that the sea lion may have confused her blackberry for food. Who knew they could read?

Not so Fab

Back in 1999 there wasn’t a lady in the United States who didn’t swoon a little when they saw male model Fabio strutting his stuff. Sporting a ridiculous blond mane, speaking in a very peculiar pseudo Italian-American accent and with rippling muscles adding meat to his 6ft 3inch frame he was the epitome of hunkiness. Naturally, he also made most men sick in the mouth.

That was until, they nearly choked with laughter at his expense. Boarding a rollercoaster named ‘Apollo’s Chariot’ with sexy females on each arm as part of a publicity stunt for Busch Gardens in Williamsburg, Fabio looked to be having the time of his life. A minute later he was smacked square in the face by a bird and left covered in blood.

As for the bird, he did not fair as well. According to one park guest a dead goose could be seen floating in the river below the drop where Fabio was supposedly hit.

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